Jake: That hit him in the lung. It could put him in a coma.
PJ: -pointing to the right side of his chest- But your lung's over here.
Troi: You have two lungs.
PJ: You do? Someone told me you only have one.

Wendy: You're getting old people eyelashes again.
PJ: You're giving old people allergies??

Lyrics: And mothers, children, brothers, sisters torn apart.
Troi: That's sad.
PJ: -taking lyrics literally- Sad? That's sick!

PJ: Mom, whenever there's a loud noise, for some reason I feel a tingling in my foot.

Mom: I need to buy Troi some new pants.
PJ: -wide-eyed- Who's in Troi's pants?

Troi: -handing something to PJ, but dropping it- Oh, sorry.
PJ: -looking at Troi incredulously- I'll take that as a sorry.

Mom: Why are you failing your French class?
PJ: Because I don't know how to speak French.